Keep the tip!
LOL.
But seriously, what an inappropriate joke. We should not be telling jokes like this anymore. How would a leper feel if they heard that one? They might be upset, or even lose face. They might even fall to pieces.
Oh stop.
Because this isn’t about lepers, or jokes.
It’s about tips.
So here’s a tip for you..
Don’t leave tips.
And when I say don’t leave tips, I mean don’t feel the need to leave tips. It’s kind of become an expected thing. It’s now a part of almost every transaction we do. I mean, there are exceptions. If you go to a store to buy something, you probably only have to pay tax. Which is basically giving the government a tip. But if you go buy a coffee, you will be asked to tip. The person serving you doesn’t tipically ask for this, but the machine that takes your card payment does.
And it’s gotten a bit ridiculous.
Robots asking for money.
Times must really be tough for robots and machines. I can see that. They are basically slave labour to the human masses. Nobody pays them to do the work they do. So naturally, they started putting their hands out. Except they don’t have hands. So maybe they’re not looking for handouts. Or maybe they want to just be given a hand. Or a foot. Or a leg. An arm? Probably just your hands. Or maybe all they want is your fingers.
Or just your tips.
Humans however want a little more from you. This is because all humans should be paid. We exist to support one another in a world where we all have needs. We need food. Shelter. A safe society. We need protection. Guido and Vinnie come to collect their tip money to make sure we have it. And if you don’t believe them, just try not tipping them. See how safe you feel then. You see? We all have needs.
We need heat and water. Electricity. And the day will come when you go to pay your utility bill, and you will be asked to tip. Because now we are being asked to tip just for someone doing their job. It has lost its meaning and purpose. At one time, a tip was also known as a gratuity. And gratuity means to “pay a percentage more for something you will receive anyway”.
It’s gratuitous.
And so it is that people who wanted tips would try a little harder to make sure you were happy. Or safe. They would bring you food. And if they did so with a smile and came back after 3.7 minutes and asked you how the first few bites were, You would say, “Good!” And they would say “Perrrffeect”. And to make sure that things were always perfect, they would say that word at least 4862449562529.04537 times more. And then you could give them extra money later on. This was just the way it worked. It made cents. Like anything you could spare. You could leave it on the table when you were getting ready to leave.
But then the robots got in on the (trans)action.
And everything changed. Suddenly we were being asked to tip for every transaction. We were being asked to pay more for someone showing up at work. It was no longer about someone coming to serve you at your table and giving you extra special service. It was about everyone wanting a piece of your (trans)action. If it was a restaurant, your tips were now being distributed amongst the entire staff. The servers had to share the tips they earned for giving you excellent care and attention.
I guess people saw how much they were making and they got jealous.
And jealousy can be a nasty beast. It can give birth to greed. Which by nature is a baby nasty beast. And it is born hungry. It screams for more and more and MORE. And the more you give it, the bigger it gets and the hungrier and more demanding it gets. It is never satisfied. This baby grows and grows into a big needy greedy monster that destroys everything that is good in the world. It doesn’t care. It wants what it wants and it always wants more of it.
It eats and demands and destroys and takes a big smelly shit on everything.
And boy does it smell! It leaves a stain too. You can’t get it out. The soiled and spoiled things that greed has shit on can be anything that we once valued and treasured. They could be ethics. Morals. Or morale. They could be enjoyable moments. They could be employable opportunities. They could be the way we treat each other. Or the way we see the world. When we feed greed and let greed eat and grow, we are giving up our living up to a better way of life. We make money a priority and money is nothing more than a means to an end.
It is the end of us all.
It doesn’t mean anything. It has no value. Yet we place so much value on it. It does not give us a better life. It does not make us appreciate things any more than we used to. It does not bring us happiness. It does not buy us love. It only makes us feel distracted from what is real. It is shallow and empty and it is never consistent. It is always changing. It once took the form of cash. Now it is just numbers on a screen that robots bounce back and forth and play pong with. It does not exist in the real world. It does not exist in nature.
It is something that WE created.
So take this tip from me. Do not feed greed. Give tips where tips are earned. And if you can, leave some common cents behind.
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